Indie Film Review “Key of Bones: Curse of the Ghost Pirate” Avast, ye mateys!! Legend, lore, legacy, and rejuvenated longing merge in this horror/comedy mash-up that forms a wholly entertaining indie romp
WATCH THE TRAILER BELOW:
First, the Recap:
Stories from the past. Even the ones based on actual history can sometimes be taken and turned into a mix of truth and mythos, which usually serves to enhance the desire to learn while also letting imagination rule the day as well. There are certain eras that lend themselves to this treatment, as is assuredly the case with the mid-1650’s through to 1730, giving rise to some of the most notorious characters ever…..pirates! And when one would cross them, much less wrong them, what else but retribution would you expect??
Take, for example, Anne Bonny (Melissa Chick) and Mary Read (Gina Vitori), as they literally fight to preserve their treasure, reputations, and future. But, when things don’t go quite as planned when in conflict with the British forces they’ve more than once pillaged at sea, Anne invokes a curse. In the current day, when the curse is inadvertently brought back to life in Key West by a waitress (Gina Vitori), a tourist (Jeremy King), and a local ghost-tour guide (Chad Newman), things are about to downright freaky when a queen rises bent on rekindling old love and chaos.
Next, my Mind:
Ever since watching the very first theatrical indie film I ever had way back in 2012 via Neil Jordan’s epic vampire fantasy/horror effort “Byzantium”, it has been a journey of recognizing that I was in such greater need of films with real SUBSTANCE. To actually be prompted to THINK about what you’re watching, dig into the themes, really trying to soak in the messaging and intent while also experiencing the relatability and accessibility of the narrative as it, in some way or ways, applied to our actual lives. While it would be another two years later that OneFilmFan.com was born, and almost another year after that before independent cinema unexpectedly became the community and true passion to support and take my voice around the world, it was clearer and clearer that it was the place to be for the more gratifying, meaningful, and cerebral material the films contained within this arena so consistently offer.
THIS film, while contained within this indie circle, is honestly NOT one of those styles of films in any way…..and I LOVE it! When it comes to the new feature project from writer/director/producer/editor Tony Armer, producers Chuck Ardezzone, Anthony Pernicka, Cameron Brumbelow, and Mark Pulaski alongside executive producers Glenn Sugden, Mark P. Rankin, Robert Nucci, Robert Catana, Laurie Criego, Bill Francis, and Steven Demmler, shiver me timbers we are remotely going for depth or Illuminati-level meanings to contemplate well after the story ends. Nay, ya scalawags and scoundrels, we’re here to just plain have some F-U-N thanks to a mix of actual history-based foundations, mainly comedic leanings, and a nice dose of splatter-effect horror that merges together to create the grander whole of insanity we witness.
The narrative, which follows the resurrected (and acutely TICKED OFF) spirit of an infamous pirate queen in search of both vengeance and to rediscover her lost love in current times when a past curse causes her to seek out all she’s lost and most emphatically wants BACK, follows a course that many would most likely wish to dismiss as way too predictable overall, even to the extent of “been there, seen that” thinking. Folks, this film doesn’t try to be anything else than what it is and, frankly in this critic’s opinion, what it SHOULD be as hinted above…..sheer entertainment. For those who enjoy a nice pirate-y escapade, it’s here. For those who want some bloody horror featuring “wrong place, wrong time” innocents getting slashed with classic swords, it’s here. For those who enjoy some goofy humor, it’s here. And for those who are just looking to sit back, not think, and RELAX with a slice of over-the-top indie film wonder, it’s here!
Folks, and I am just being candid not cruel or insensitive in saying this, we’re not talking Oscar material. And if THAT is what you are seeking, then this WON’T be for you. This critic personally found the opportunity to laugh and have a good time watching a film that didn’t require in depth analyzation a refreshing change. And this is NOT calling the film STUPID or BRAINLESS, either. It almost reminded me of combining “Pirates of the Caribbean” with “ZombieCon Vol. 1“. Again….good old fashioned FUN!! The baseline themes of living up to a legacy, trying to correct the past..or escape it, finding what you are truly made of, sacrifice for a greater good, and seeing evil put down all show up here amidst the wonderfully crafted visuals that rely on…blimey!!…practical effects in this digital age, one whopper of a magnificent pirate outfit for Anne, and a highly apropos music score which converge to manifest the wittiness and action we’re privy to.
The ending might be, yes, predictable to a degree, but SO WHAT?! Landlubbers, ye must fathom the means to cool your lofty expectations and instead settle into a calm mood to appreciate what ye are absorbing, savvy? If this is already how you approach watching this film, a hearty “Yo-ho-ho!!” and a bottle of rum for ye! Just no drinking and sailing…or swashbuckling. When certain types of roles come about, I find myself believing actors just RELISH having the chance to play them, and here I felt this when watching Chick embody the brashness, mild bawdiness, and all-out revenge-minded, supernaturally-infused red eyes a’blazing bombast she brought forth through her turn as Anne Bonny, a tough-as-nails corsair whose spirit is raised in our modern times when an age-old curse gets accidentally invoked, calling her up from the netherworld to exact cold comeuppance and restore her love for last comrade Mary Read.
Chick oozes both alluring and frightening charisma throughout, portraying a woman scorned with conspicuous, deliciously delightful glee, done with intentionally overstated energy that so befits the character to a “T” and which the actress HAD to just savor in performing every moment. Vitori gets to play double-duty here, and does so with a perfect magnitude of poise, bravado, and vulnerability while not allowing her contemporary times character to be any kind of pushover. Seeing her life not quite going as she wishes, in a job that barely pays the bills in Key West, and the target of a particular island visitor whom she despises, things take a more….otherworldly….turn when a random choice brings a curse to life. Soon, she finds herself a target of a different kind of stalker, and must team up with two other individuals to try and rectify the horror wrecking havoc on the town while learning about a certain ancestor whom she has an unwanted connection to.
Vitori as Mary (x2) is steadfast and strong in this role, again not per se some typical damsel in distress, but not to the level where she’s reminded that being helped by others CAN have unanticipated results. Hmmm. Watch and see. Jeremy King is a tourist nicknamed “Christie” (for reasons divulged, don’t worry) whose cockiness and shameless flirting with modern day Mary gets him in hot water with her, though as time goes on and the body count starts building, he may show a side of himself that could win her over. King is very adept at portraying “Christie’s” arrogance to an extent you really love to hate him, but then calms it down and, while still maintaining some of that ego-centric bluster, just might change your mind about him, thanks to King’s entertaining performance.
 
Chad Newman plays Dave, the third part of our primary and intrepid ghost-fighting trio, a Key West ghost-tour and related museum owner who is easily the first person to believe what is unfolding when Mary comes to him advising about strange occurrences and individuals afoot. Dave’s affable, nerdy nature immediately wins you over, and his knowledge of the island’s pirate past, plus who and what they are dealing with, becomes integral to the narrative’s course. What extent will Dave’s abilities to help go to? Watch and find out! Newman plays the character so adorably, just being real, and it is virtually impossible NOT to like him AND the character start to finish. The three of these actors together as our “curse battling” crew works excellently, their chemistry evident through the hilarious banter yet unwavering support the characters often share between them.
Primary supporting roles come first from Vincent De Paul as Ernesto, a snarky and sniveling local councilman who is very much ONLY out for himself and his perceived “importance” and “fame”. Chuck Ardezzone and Tony Armer are King and Pierce, “Christie’s” two friends whom may end up on the wrong side of a sharp, pointy object when Anne comes calling. Benjamin Healy is Desiree, a local drag queen who ends up involved in events very much against her will, but it is a RIOT to watch! Ty Spann is Ezekiel, a former slave in Anne’s original time whom she chooses to resurrect in order to be her servant with the promises of freedom for him and his family once she succeeds. Kitty Clements is Barbara, the spirit of an old lighthouse keeper and protector of Key West who just may pass the torch onto a new generation of warriors!
Additional supporting turns are made by Coach Delaney, Wesley Dean, Jessica Wachs, Meg Hashem, Mark Pulaski, Rhett Kalman, Maylin Morera, Liza Jane, Dominic Paolillo, Belisa Lea, Cecil Lee Lawson, Samantha Queen, David Gernovich, Donavan Pavlicek, Robert Catana, Gwen Filosa, Brook Long, Jose Davila, Michael Rulli, and Kylee Michael Henderson among others. So, in total, lest ye are to be given no quarter and made to walk the plank otherwise, grab your saltwater-filled balloons, super-soakers, some iron, and maybe some popcorn and proceed to get your “booty” to a couch, sit back, and permit the wackiness to wash over ye, understand ya dogs?!! Good. Now, shove off, bucko, fair winds and following seas to ye.
STAR RATING (out of 5):
As always, this is all for your comment and consideration. Until next time, thank you for reading!
